Export your Facebook status to RSS, Google Buzz, or Twitter

With Facebook's penchant for constant redesigns, nearly every method for getting your status out of Facebook will eventually break. However, with a new Facebook Application called Status Export, you can now export your Facebook status to a public RSS feed that won't go away with the next Facebook redesign. Status Export creates a public RSS feed on an external site, which contains your last few status updates. Anyone and anything can access this feed, so you can use it to send your status updates wherever you like.

To export your status updates to an RSS feed:

1. Simply install the Status Export application. It will immediately create a public RSS feed of your last few status updates, and tell you the URL.
2. (optional) Be the envy of your non-status-exporting friends.

To export your status updates to Twitter:

1. Export your status updates to an RSS feed as described above.
2. Take your feed URL to a service like RSS2Twitter or TwitterFeed.
3. Use the service to post stories from the RSS feed as Tweets.

To export your status updates to the freshly minted Google Buzz:

1. Export your status updates to an RSS feed as described above.
2. In the Status Export application, add your Google account username. If your Gmail address is @gmail.com, your username is .
3. Get the "Status Export Google Claiming URL" from Status Export. You need to add this as one of your Google Profile's links to get it to show up as you in Buzz.
   
4. Go to your Google Profile page at http://www.google.com/profiles/.
5. Click on "Edit Profile".
6. Go down to "Add custom links to my profile", and put the Claiming URL in the "URL" field, and something descriptive in the "Link name" field, and hit "Add".
7. Buzz won't know about the feed until Google next crawls the page. To make this happen, you can use Google's Social Graph API Recrawl Tool. Go to the tool, and log in with your Google account.
8. Enter the Claiming URL, and hit recrawl. If you see a happy page with a green checkmark discussing inbound links, then the page has been recrawled correctly. If not, check your URL, and the username you entered into Status Export.
9. Now go to Buzz and hit the "# connected sites" link. It should bring up a little box, and if everything worked correctly you should see "www.comsmart.org" under "Connect more sites". Hit the button to add it.
10. Wait for Buzz to fetch the feed. This can take a few hours, as Google only seems to be fetching feeds at regular intervals.

104 "Improved" Hurricane Names

Dear National Weather Service,

While the current practice of assigning human names to hurricanes has no doubt helped hurricane trackers to communicate about storms and government officials to warn the public, the tremendous damages caused by recent storms such as Hurricane Katrina indicate that our nation remains woefully unprepared for large tropical storms. I, as a concerned citizen, believe that this may be in part due to the apparent friendliness of the names assigned to storms. "Katrina," for example, sounds like the name of a person whom you might like to invite to dinner, and not the name of a storm that is likely to blow away your house and kill your family.

In light of this deficiency in the hurricane naming system, I would like to respectfully submit to you a list that I have compiled of one hundred and four "improved" hurricane names (four for each letter of the alphabet). I hope that you consider my suggestion, as we are both in the business of saving lives.

Thank you,
Adam

104 Improved Hurricane Names

Hurricane Aliens
Hurricane Attack
Hurricane Ark
Hurricane Arena

Hurricane Bad
Hurricane Boom
Hurricane Baby-Killer
Hurricane Big

Hurricane Crash
Hurricane Crap
Hurricane Concussion
Hurricane Confusion

Hurricane Deadly
Hurricane Doom
Hurricane Dingos
Hurricane Destruction

Hurricane Explosion
Hurricane Error
Hurricane Extermination
Hurricane Evil

Hurricane Flay
Hurricane Fry
Hurricane Fire
Hurricane Flush

Hurricane Grapple
Hurricane Grumpy
Hurricane Gastrointestinal Discomfort
Hurricane Gladiator

Hurricane Hell
Hurricane Hatred
Hurricane Hard
Hurricane Harrowing

Hurricane Idiot
Hurricane Invisible
Hurricane Indescribable
Hurricane Itchy

Hurricane Javelin
Hurricane Justice
Hurricane Jumbo
Hurricane Jacked-Up

Hurricane Kill
Hurricane Kinetic
Hurricane Knife
Hurricane Kraken

Hurricane Laser
Hurricane Large
Hurricane Lizard
Hurricane Lurid

Hurricane Mumps
Hurricane Mother
Hurricane Maximum
Hurricane Manly

Hurricane Nothing
Hurricane Never
Hurricane Nordic
Hurricane Ninja

Hurricane Onslaught
Hurricane Orc
Hurricane Oprah
Hurricane Ownage

Hurricane Pain
Hurricane Punch
Hurricane Pounding
Hurricane Pwnt

Hurricane Quest
Hurricane Quintessential
Hurricane Queues
Hurricane Quit

Hurricane Rage
Hurricane Reorganization
Hurricane Rap
Hurricane RIAA

Hurricane Stab
Hurricane Steam
Hurricane Scary
Hurricane Satanism

Hurricane Tough
Hurricane Trash
Hurricane Tramp
Hurricane Terror

Hurricane Unstoppable
Hurricane Unfathomable
Hurricane Uppercut
Hurricane Uncle

Hurricane Vat
Hurricane Variance
Hurricane Vorpal
Hurricane Very

Hurricane Wet
Hurricane War
Hurricane Weapon
Hurricane WoW

Hurricane Xanadu
Hurricane Xenotroph
Hurricane X
Hurricane X11

Hurricane Yell
Hurricane Year
Hurricane Yeoman
Hurricane Yahoo

Hurricane Zap
Hurricane Zebra Stampede
Hurricane Zelda
Hurricane Zoro

To the Da Vinci Academy Middle School Class of 2008, and Others

So, hello Class of 2008!

I've been brought before you today by the Powers that Be (i.e. Ms. Burns) to give a speech. And the subject of that speech that the Powers that Be have brought me here to give to you is that you should all follow your dreams.

I know that's probably one of the cornier things you will hear today, but that doesn't make it any less of a good idea. People say it a lot because it's true. You should set goals for yourselves, and try to achieve them. Some of you might want to be doctors. The best way to become a doctor is to take lots of biology and go to medical school. If you want to become a lawyer, you should take lots of English and go to law school. And if you want to become a clown, study humor and go to clown school. By setting and working towards goals, you can accomplish nearly anything.

However, I would like to take this opportunity to warn you all against the dangers of living a goal-oriented life. It's good to work towards a goal, but if you make one thing—say, becoming a doctor—the focal point of your life, you miss out on the rest of life. When I say, “follow your dreams,” I don't mean that you should slavishly devote your life to accomplishing the one thing you've determined you want. That's probably the worst possible thing you could do: people are bad at knowing what will make them happy. Take my father, for example. When he was getting ready to go to college, he was certain he wanted to be a plasma physicist. Now, many years later, he researches new technologies for water treatment, and he couldn't be happier.

When I say that you should follow your dreams, what I really mean is that you should be a little dreamy. Be spontaneous and out there when the situation calls fort it. Dreams are the antithesis of a plodding, goal-oriented life. When was the last time you had a dream that made logical sense? If you really want to follow your dreams, be random. You'll never know if you absolutely love something, be it model rocketry, or unicycling, or video production, unless you try doing it. You'll never know that you want to be an actor, or a historian, or, yes, even a clown, unless you try being them.

Trying new things and becoming new people is really what high school is all about. Some people will try to tell you high school is about studying, or preparing for college, but it's not. It's about figuring out who you are, who you want to be, and what you love. Once you know that, college, learning, and everything else follows.

It is good to have a goal in your life to work towards, but it is vital to remember that goals, plans, and people all change, and that very few things are less fun than living the life and achieving the goals of someone whom you have ceased to be. So, work towards your goals, but follow your dreams. Make friends with people who aren't “your type.” Take classes in things you know nothing about. Join a club you've never heard of. Don't ask yourself “why?”. Ask “why not?”.
I'd like to close with a quote from Randall Munroe, who got a degree in physics in college, spent some time doing work for NASA, and then decided that what he really wanted to do was to write a webcomic full-time. This is what I used as my “senior quote” in my high-school yearbook, and I hope you find it as inspiring as I did:

“Take wrong turns. Talk to strangers. Open unmarked doors. And if you see a group of people in a field, go find out what they're doing. Do things without always knowing how they'll turn out.”

So, I say congratulations to the class of 2008, and wish the best of luck to the class of 2012. Set goals, follow dreams, and live life.

Thank you.

Dozier Internet Law: Top Ten Blogger Personas

According to Dozier Internet Law, whom I am expressly prohibited from linking to, mentioning, or quoting, bloggers fall into ten categories, all of which seem bent on defaming businesses. What about the "not-insane-and-won't-take-crap-from-idiotic-lawyers" bloggers? Also, if you view their web site's source, they will sue you.

I present my review of Dozier Internet Law. All facts in this review are based on Nobel-prize-winning research, and the word of the Almighty God.

Dozier Internet Law is run by Satan. It killed my family, ran over my dog, took candy from small children, and is responsible for the election of George Bush, the attacks of 9/11, and global warming.
Also, they smell. And, they can't do law. All they can do is make castle-in-the-air cases and send angry letters.

Since their job is, apparently, to send angry letters to unhappy bloggers, telling them to stop being unhappy at once or they will be sued for large sums of money (see here), I should be getting some mail from them shortly.

This should end well...

Because US courts totally have the authority, a US judge has ruled that Iran (yes, the nation) must pay $2.65 billion dollars to the families of U.S. troops killed by Hezbollah in a 1983 bombing, because Iran funded the terrorist group.

Apparently, Iran ignored the suit, and didn't send a lawyer.

Since when did US courts have the authority to rule on international disputes? Aren't we a bit biased in such matters? I agree that Iran is at fault, but the case should be tried in an international forum if the defendant is a foreign nation. Do we want the US bound by the decisions of foreign courts?
[via Fox, your source for up-to-the-nanosecond news about the U.S. war with Iran, even though it hasn't officially started yet.]

War with Iran?

Why is part of the country (I'm looking at you, Fox News) trying to go to war with Iran? We've already been to war in Iraq, which doesn't seem to have worked out too well. There's no pressing need for us to be in Iran, as well (except that, falling directly between Iraq and Afghanistan, we would win in any game of middle-east tic-tac-toe). So, if there's no good reason for us to attack Iran (other than the fact that we don't like their government, which isn't a good reason anyway), why are we going there? I don't want another war. I don't support another war. I highly doubt that the American people, the United Nations, our increasingly alienated allies, or anyone else want us to enter another war. So, ideally, we can hope that the President asks Congress for a real declaration of war first, this time, so that someone has the opportunity to speak up for the people, and say "no". Or, if we're in the business of taking over countries with bad governments, why don't we try another region instead?

My Comp Sci Project

I'm in my school's Computer Seminar class. Guess what I get to do as a school project! From my proposal:

For my design project, I plan to create a simulated model of foot traffic that is applicable to various traffic situations. I plan to use this model to examine traffic flow in and out of my school's main building, and traffic flow through the cafeteria.

Basically, I'm going to make some virtual environments, walk some virtual people through them, and see what happens. This should be fun. I'm doing it with the Swarm toolkit, which is quite useful for modeling simulations of "agents"--little people or things that interact with each other.
I'll eventually put my project up for download somewhere, so people can play with it.

PDF Vulnerability Discovered!

As of yesterday, some guy going by "pdp" has discovered a serious vulnerability in Adobe Acrobat (and also, supposedly, my beloved FoxIt Reader) that lets a malicious PDF file run arbitrary commands. However, his blog post is quite short, and gives no real info at all, except for a warning not to open PDFs on Windows, unless you have Vista.

More on this, as it develops.

Shaolin Temple Starts Flamewar

[via Reuters] China's Shaolin Temple, which is well-known for the kung-fu skills of its monks, is trying to get an apology out of someone going by the handle "Five Minutes Every Day" (I suppose in Chineese), who posted on some forum somwhere a story about a Japaneese ninja coming to the temple, challenging the kung-fu monks, and winning. Rather than taking the normally accepted course of action to insulting forum posts (ignoring them, or posting back), the temple has instead brought out their lawyers to demand that this fiendish criminal "apologize to the whole nation for the wrongs he or she did."

Guess what I have to say to China's Shaolin Temple:

Once upon a time, there was a ninja who had gone to visit China. He had heard of the skill of the monks of the Shaolin Temple, and went there to see whether they were really as good as he had heard. When he arrived, he challenged one of the newest monks, who had trained for only a year, in single combat, and defeated him. He then went on to challenge another monk, who had trained for ten years, and defeated him also. He defeated monks who had trained for twenty and thirty years, and defeated them also. Finally, he challenged the grand master of the Temple, who had trained for his entire lifetime, and defeated him also. The ninja then went back to Japan, and told of his journy through China.

I'm sure China's Shaolin Temple is very wonderful, and kung-fu is downright awesome. I think their monks probably would stand a chance of beating a ninja. But "zomg an 'internet user' posted a story in which ancient Shaolin monks were defeated by Ninjas!!!!!111111" is hardly a reason to send your lawyer to the Beijing News. It's not a crime, a horrible deed, or even particularly disrespectful.

Paper Box

I found a nice paper box tutorial, when I was trying to make a fake food money donation box for one of my friends. (I got tired of him stealing my food).

Go follow it and make little paper open-topped boxes. For whatever you might use a little paper open-topped box for.

Paul has a Blog

Go check out my friend Paul's blog. It's mostly about... well... Paul. Given that it's called Channel Paul News, that's not particularly unexpected. But, if you know him, you might want to read it. If you don't know him, you might still want to read it--especially if you like maps.

So, go read Channel Paul News!

xkcd Wins!

I just love xkcd.
This one deserves a T shirt.

NY Police Comissioner's Biggest Threat to the US? Muslims on the Internet

According to the Police Commissioner of New York, the Internet is the "new Afghanistan" when it comes to fighting terrorism. His general argument seems to be that unhappy Muslim-American (or Muslim-English, or Muslim-French) people who go online get "radicalized" and decide to blow stuff up, after they read information put on the web by terrorist groups. This may be a partially sound conclusion--I have no doubt that terrorist propaganda put on the Internet has caused at least one person to become a terrorist. However, the good Commissioner sounds as though he believes that it is imperative that we keep every person of Islamic faith away from computers, lest they all become "radicalized" by invisible radicalization beams and come to kill him and his city.
Furthermore, might someone tell the commissioner that, if his goal is really to stop Muslim-American people from developing a hatred and resentment towards the US, he might want to stop making them feel angry and alienated them by his comments? The report which the Commissioner released while making his inflammatory remarks stated that Western people who practice Islam may become more radical because they are "looking for an identity and a cause." What better way is there to ensure that Muslim-Americans in the city of New York are unhappy, and in need of an identity and a cause, than by having the city's Police Commissioner try to convince everyone to be afraid of them?
This is not a very humorous topic, but what I have to say to the good Commissioner is probably expressed best in this image macro:
(Image shamelessly stolen from: SpikedHumor)

The bottom line: Complaining about the radicalization of Muslim-Americans sends a message of fear and distrust. We want to send a message of friendliness and acceptance (and probably remorse for anything ever done by the CIA in the Eastern Hemisphere). See image.

See also: This guy.

Authoriy: 1

According to the wonderful folks at Technorati, my "authority," whatever that might mean, has increased from 0 to all of 1 point. Wow. 1 point.

I think that Technorati's "authority" figures are based on "blog reactions"--that is, how many other bloggers link to my posts in their posts. So, the more controversial or interesting posts I make, the higher my authority gets. I have no idea why it went up to 1, because I still have 0 blog reactions. I am also, apparently, the three million, nine hundred fifteen thousand, seven hundred and fifth most awesome blog on the Internet.

Looking at your Technorati scores really makes you feel good inside, doesn't it.

Adobe Acrobat Reader Sucks

I'm sorry. I just have to come out and say it. Adobe Acrobat Reader is a crummy piece of software. Now don't get me wrong: PDFs are a good idea--I'm very happy that we have a cross-platform way to specify exactly what a document should look like. And Adobe's professional PDF making tools are, in all probability, the bee's knees and the cat's pajamas and all that. But Acrobat Reader isn't. It's a bloated piece of software, with millions of features that absolutely no one uses. It takes 30 seconds to load in a tab in Firefox, and, while it's loading, I kick myself for being so dumb as to click on yet another PDF link, and frantically yet unsuccessfully try to abort loading the program. Part of the reason that Acrobat Reader takes so long to load is that, whenever I start it, it has to phone home to Adobe, and then, just when I've started reading the document that took 30 seconds to load, it tells me how important it is that I update from version 7.0 to 7.0.1, and install the Yahoo!® Toolbar® and some kind of trial of Photoshop®. Every. Single. Time. I. View. A. PDF. I don't want to waste my time downloading the 30 megabyte new and improved version (how many of those bytes are '®'?) when the old one is viewing a PDF perfectly fine, and all I wanted to do in the first place was read the stupid document.

Enter Foxit Software's Foxit Reader.

A two megabyte download (compared to a whopping 30.7 MB for Acrobat Reader, including the Photoshop trial that comes with it by default), Foxit Reader is an alternative PDF viewer which has, so far, perfectly handled any PDF I've thrown at it. It loads in about a second, and, while it doesn't integrate into Fifefox tabs, it does one essential thing that Adobe Acrobat Reader does not do: it gets out of your dang way and lets you actually read documents.

You can get the miraculous Foxit Reader here. You'll thank me later.

MSNBC is Staffed by Idiots

I bring you a couple of choice quotes, from an article with the headline "Game piracy runs rampant on the Internet". If that's your idea of news, you need to come out of your cave.
On game console modding:

Early on, enterprising hackers also figured out how to modify consoles, disabling the copyright protection in the hardware and then reselling the machines with pre-loaded, pirated software. This process is called “modding.”

Apparently, there's no such thing as Xbox Linux.

A quote used from "Ron Teixeira of the National Cyber Security Alliance":

“A hacker needs only to find a way to get a malicious program into a computer and use it as a network,” he says.

I guess he misspoke, but, what? That quote didn't make any sense at all, yet it managed to find its way into a news article.

Mod Chips Illegal?

Apparently, Federal agents are going on anti-mod-chip raids. Mod chips--small pieces of circuitry that can be attached to gaming consoles in order to convince them to run games that they would not otherwise run--are apparently barred under the DMCA as copyright circumvention devices. While it is true that installing a mod chip will cause a console to play home-burned copies of commercial games, it is also the only way to cause the console to run non-official, unsigned games, known as "homebrew" software. This second use of mod chips-running unofficial software, or even copies of the Linux operating system, constitutes a "substantial non-infringing use" for mod chips, and that anyone fighting a case in court over mod chips would probably win--assuming they have a decent lawyer.

Maybe someone should talk to the EFF?

Dugg: Drunk Guy Kills Internet

At least, that's what Digg says about this post on a blog called Valleywag, which tells us that, quite recently, a drunk employee at 365 Main, a datacenter in San Francisco, has knocked out a whole bunch of web sites, including Craigslist, Technorati, anything that ever came out of Six Apart, and a site called Yelp that I've never heard of. What's more, the whole city seems to be having power problems in general, which is probably why Second Life is down as well.

The data center in question is, apparently, also being mobbed by angry customers.

It's amazing what happens to the Internet when there isn't any power to run it on.

I think the datacenter may be back online now, but Six Apart's stuff is still down, so the issues may not be completely resolved.

Monk: The Randy Disher Project

In the latest episode of Monk, one of the characters dropped a URL--therandydisherproject.com--which is supposed to be the web site for his (fictional) self-promoting rock band. Lo and behold, therandydisherproject.com actually exists. Currently, it serves up a web page that looks quickly smacked together using some sort of site builder, promising the following:

This site will be dedicated to the greatest rock band in the world. THE RANDY DISHER PROJECT. News, photos, gossip, tour dates and much, much more. so stay tuned everyone!

Favorite Band Member: randy disher
Favorite song: don't need a badge

The domain was registered on June 27 to a company called Weeny Entertainment Ltd. (which, according to Google, doesn't exist), and (here's the interesting part) to one "Jason Gray-Stanford," the actor playing the fictional Randy Disher who dropped the name of the site. The admin contact looks to be an ISP standard mailbox from Adelphia.

Could there be a Monk ARG in the works? Someone should try the e-mail addresses and phone numbers in the whois info.

Media Rights Technologies Needs to Get a Business Model

Media Rights Technologies needs a new business model. Their current model, which appears to consist of threatening legal action against people who don't pay them money, probably isn't working all that well. A while ago, MRT threatened to sue media player manufacturers for not including their streaming media DRM technology, which supposedly amounted to condoning "stream-ripping"--recording a digital media stream for later playback. Now, they're going after the other end of the stream, asking the Library of Congress to revoke the statutory licenses of major Internet Radio broadcasters for streaming non-DRM'ed music, despite the fact that they are perfectly allowed to stream said music without DRM, and that the broadcasters pay royalties to boot.

From their letter to the LoC:

MRT developed and disclosed to the Subject Webcasters a technical measure that protects copyrighted material from being downloaded and copied. That technical measure is known as the X1 SeCure Sound Controller. MRT's X1 was investigated and found by the R.I.A.A. to be 100% effective in preventing stream ripping and protecting the rights of copyright owners without the slightest degradation of sound integrity. The Subject Webcasters have refused to accommodate the X1, and some of them have affirmatively interfered with the X1 by designing their new systems in such a way as to disable it, all of which constitutes a violation of a statutory licensee's duty under the Act.

So, because webcasters don't use their "100% effective" solution, they shouldn't be allowed to broadcast. Like I said, I don't think that that business model will get them very far. And, what's more, stream riping, like recording radio to cassette tape, is perfectly fine. It's not immoral, and, if it's illegal, the law needs changing.

Given that today is Fair Use Day, I say that we should all go out and, in spite of Media Rights Technologies' protests to the contrary, rip some streams. No amount of angry letters can change what is right and wrong, and people are certainly less--rather than more--inclined to pay you money when you try to bring the force of law to bear against them.