Friday, August 31, 2007

Shaolin Temple Starts Flamewar

[via Reuters] China's Shaolin Temple, which is well-known for the kung-fu skills of its monks, is trying to get an apology out of someone going by the handle "Five Minutes Every Day" (I suppose in Chineese), who posted on some forum somwhere a story about a Japaneese ninja coming to the temple, challenging the kung-fu monks, and winning. Rather than taking the normally accepted course of action to insulting forum posts (ignoring them, or posting back), the temple has instead brought out their lawyers to demand that this fiendish criminal "apologize to the whole nation for the wrongs he or she did."

Guess what I have to say to China's Shaolin Temple:
Once upon a time, there was a ninja who had gone to visit China. He had heard of the skill of the monks of the Shaolin Temple, and went there to see whether they were really as good as he had heard. When he arrived, he challenged one of the newest monks, who had trained for only a year, in single combat, and defeated him. He then went on to challenge another monk, who had trained for ten years, and defeated him also. He defeated monks who had trained for twenty and thirty years, and defeated them also. Finally, he challenged the grand master of the Temple, who had trained for his entire lifetime, and defeated him also. The ninja then went back to Japan, and told of his journy through China.
I'm sure China's Shaolin Temple is very wonderful, and kung-fu is downright awesome. I think their monks probably would stand a chance of beating a ninja. But "zomg an 'internet user' posted a story in which ancient Shaolin monks were defeated by Ninjas!!!!!111111" is hardly a reason to send your lawyer to the Beijing News. It's not a crime, a horrible deed, or even particularly disrespectful.

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